-So, during our last hiatus
from the show, my wife and I
did some traveling.,, and we took a vacation to
the Caribbean. And it really was
as lovely a trip as — -Uh, hey, Seth?
-Yeah, Tom? -That word you just said —
you pronounced it wrong. -What word was that?
“Car-i-bbean”? -Bingo. It’s actually pronounced
“Caribb-ean.” -Oh, and I said?
-Car-i-bbean. -And that was…
-Wrong. -And? -Dumb.
-Oh. Well, now I feel wrong and dumb. Hey, Wally, do you say
Caribb-ean or Car-i-bean? -Well, I know there’s the movie
“Pirates of the Car-i-bbean.” -Mm-Hmm. -But then sequel is called
“Pirates of the Caribb-ean.” -Uh-huh. -And then, of course, there’s
the third one, “Parats of the Carburetor.” But that’s the best one because
it’s got Johnny Deep in it. -I don’t think
that helps us out. Hey, Buck, do you say
“Caribb-ean” or “Car-i-bbean”? -You know, I always forget
how to say it. and then I have to sing
the lyrics to “Kokomo” by The Beach Boys
in order to remember. Just give me a minute. ♪ Aruba, Jamaica ♪ ♪ Ooh, I wanna take you ♪ ♪ To Bermuda, Bahama ♪ ♪ Come on, pretty mama ♪ -Hey, Buck, buddy?
-♪ Key Largo, Montego ♪ ♪ Ooh, I wanna
take you down to Kokomo ♪ -Hey, Buck? -♪ We’ll get there fast
and then we’ll slow ♪ ♪ That’s where we want to go ♪ ♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪ -Hey, Buck, I don’t think the
word Caribbean is in that song. -I know.
But it should be, though, right? -Well, I don’t feel any closer to finding the answer
to my question. Hey, Ally, you like to travel. Is it “Caribb-ean” or
“Car-i-bbean?” -Oh, I don’t know.
I was never very good at math. -Well, it’s not a math question.
It’s a vocab question. -This might not help,
but I can tell you that the square of
the hypotenuse of a right-angle triangle
is equal to the sum of the squares
of the remaining two sides. -Yeah, that does not help. But if you’re not good at math, why do you have
Pythagoras’ theorem memorized? -Oh, me and Pythagoras, we kind
of dated for a little while. Actually, we just broke up.
-I’m sorry, Ally. You dated the ancient Greek
mathematician Pythagoras? -Yeah, but we were
really bad for each other. -Ally, Ally, baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to blow my stack
at you the other night. I had too much Macedonian wine
at Symposium. I lost my cool.
It won’t happen again. -You make me feel small,
Pythagoras. This small. I promised myself that no man
would ever make me feel this small ever again. -Yeah, I won’t.
I promise I won’t. Oh, I love you, baby! I don’t want to
make you feel this small. I want to make you feel big.
This big. -I wish you did make me feel
this big, Pythagoras. Really do, but you made me
feel this small, so we’re done. -Ally, get in the van! -No, you get in the van and
drive out of my life forever! -[ Scoffs ] Whatever. [ Footsteps,
car door opens, closes ] [ Engine starts, revs ] [ Tires squeal ] [ Crash ]
Aw, damn it! [ Engine sputters ] Oh, come on! Piece of [bleep] van. -You all done over there, buddy?
-Yeah, I’ll walk. -Alright. Well, it looks like
we’re back at square one. Cripes. I’ve now asked every one
of the smartest people I know, and nobody seems
to have a good answer. Oh, wait a second!
Oh, my gosh. Hey, Baze,
you’re our head writer. Could you —
-It’s Car-i-bbean. -Okay, yeah, but what if I —
-Car-i-bbean. It’s Car-i-bbean. -Okay, yeah, but one time,
my grandmother told me that — -The word is Car-i-bbean. The pronunciation is based on
the root word “Carib,” a misnomer that
invading colonizers used to refer to
the group of indigenous people they met there. -Yeah, but what about if I —
-Look, man. You pay me to write. I have a mastery
of the English language unparalleled by anyone
in this room. If you had asked me
before any of these idiots, we wouldn’t have wasted
the last five minutes. Frankly, this all should have
been sorted out during rehearsal. You pay me to write. You don’t pay me
to participate in this whacky, meandering nonsense. And this — -Hey, man, do you have
the Zipcar app on your phone? -What? -Yeah, well, I just —
I mean, yeah, some guy just hit my van, and now — -And you want me
to rent you a Zipcar. -Yeah, well — Yeah.
-Why don’t you just take a taxi? -Oh, ’cause, you know,
I actually found this perfectly
good refrigerator, and somebody was
just throwing it away, so — -You know what?
Ultimately, I don’t care. I don’t want to know your
character’s inane backstory. So if you’ll excuse me, I’m due for a vacation
in the Car-i-bbean. Hey, Buck, sing me out! -♪ Aruba, Jamaica ♪ ♪ Ooh, I wanna take you ♪ ♪ To Bermuda, Bahama ♪ ♪ Come on, pretty mama ♪ -I think we could all
use a break.