HBO Def Poet Rafael Casal – "monster" BNV College tour @rafaelcasal

I think I might be a monster no that might sound a little crazy but I think I might be a monster in my black suit black shoes standing over this black box looking at you I think this might have made me a monster women tell us that we look handsome and funerals dressed in our black almost looked too good and what we be buried in like we're waiting our turn to be on our back I think I might be a monster cuz I don't feel nothing and a teardrop came yet neither teardrop coming I keep finding these stitches around my arms and backside from trying to pull myself together too fast too many times and I think this time I might have pulled myself together wrong or something I keep trying to pull the seams out in hopes I'll fall apart for you but underneath all I find is blood-stained concrete and flowers and pictures leaned against phone poles and messages to ghosts written in bold shock and day old candle wax on my sneakers as I stand here head down eyes closed like I've done so many times before trying to think of things to make myself feel something I got used to your death don't bother me like it should you think it would I told my mom's once that boys don't cry that's something I can't do she said you're right boys don't cry that's something a man do I guess I expect women to show emotion but you can't ask a man to cuz the minute a man do other man might get out you ain't that's some kind of beautiful monster I can't feel nothing but walk like the rest of us I talk like the rest of us no lie just the secret but I know why us boys don't cry even though we try it's cuz I keep finding new stitches around my arms and backside every time somebody dies and I can't find any tears for them staring at that picture hoping I might feel something like I did the first time this happened but the more this happens the more monster I am in aisle 12 staring and wondering what the pastures don't say and tell me what the Lord's gonna do I'm a man who knows he can read but can't make out the name on the program like it's not my friend we're just all ends to this program and after one or two of these programs what the fuck are we supposed to do we're just kids they say God is always watching well I hope he's watching this I'll shed a tear when friends blow in the wind we just make a t-shirt and we post him instead so in a sense they in the ground but the both of us dead and the more of him in the wind the more coldness is spread I want to line up of young men grinding their teeth like we speech less to what I speak yes lest we forget that I see deaths never after full life just after full night's on the cement and I see yes vecinos CNN on my streets when it's all deep breaths and he even chest now new scenes stitched on my skin to keep my knee – we've suppressed another evening I'm watching seasons change on a season pain nowadays we don't even see the rain see death cursed us made us seem insane so now we're all surface nothing deep remain and every time someone dies it just feeds the flame and we are feeling to be unstitched but no treatment came so all the good man I know just seek to blame to the street looks like a chessboard everybody with their pieces lined up on their corners making moves to check each other like this beats a game got Kings who won't punch round to be dead in the tomb Queens who do it all for us but we play them too soon plans will run out and tease the platoon move foolish gets hooked and we're back in our black suits in the back of the funeral and I wake from this tomb so we storm all the gates thinking this war has helped since we popped off but inside as a black box I feel like I've seen so many times I might as well just get in with myself we is falling apart in the faith the face of death men have a word for standing their ground and being a soldier ironically we call it heart but lover gets you killed so we put ours in the dark under my black suit black shoes oh thank you baby she don't know that I'm a monster we are turning into monsters can't feel shit but walk like the rest of us talk like the rest of us no lie just a secret but I know us boys don't cry even though we try because I got a monster

37 thoughts on “HBO Def Poet Rafael Casal – "monster" BNV College tour @rafaelcasal

  1. It's so…refreshing, relieving, reviving coming back and watching some of your old poetry. Particularly after bingeing on your raps the last week or so. I'm emotionally compromised right now.

  2. What really drives this home is his passion and facial expressions you can tell it's really heart felt. Rafael is one of the illest poets I've ever let into my eardrums. Top 3 caliber.

  3. I heard the song skitzo by him so I decided to look him up and seen he was a poet also found out he is white dude is cool big ups

  4. yea you're too… awesome and instead of working on my 8 page essay i'm watching all of your videos. this is a problematic situation!!!!

  5. "Ironically we call it heart, but love will get you killed – so we put ours in the dark…"
    That really hit close to home. I almost felt a tinge of unhappiness when I heard that line. I locked my heart away in a steel box years ago.

  6. This is my favorite by you for sure. It was Barbie and Ken 101 and then i watched this. You are so inspiring.

  7. its crazy wen you watch somethn and you knw very well that wat u r watchn is powerful and can move anyone who stops and listens this is amazing

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