Breast Education: 1950's Sex Ed Parody

Oh sniff hey Cindy oh gee you sure look swell in that dress hell aren't you a gentleman well mother always told me to treat the prettier girls nicer than the ugly ones so I was still on for tonight mr. bacos still good for your heart and lungs say would you mind holding these while I tie my shoe sure tobacco keffe are you alright you look flustered sorry something just came up my books golly were those things they're called brass skipper my crotch feels all funny help she didn't give me syphilis she did not give you syphilis that hard lope in your pants is called an erection and it's caused by a rush of blood pumping into your penis area but how could rest cause blood to go to my penis this is all so confusing and it should be confusing a woman's breasts are as mysterious to young boys as the whereabouts of the Lindenberg baby how do I use them on my date so nervous oh don't be nervous skip this is gonna be fun why with my help you might even get lucky lucky when greeting your date be sure to look her in the eye and not a ramble bosom women find breasts staring to be unattractive in piggish a quick peek is fine as long as you do a wall she rambles on about nonsense just remember to look her in the eye and don't forget to smile unless she mentions the Holocaust when at the dinner table do your best to make small talk jeepers those breasts are ginormous luckily she made turkey breasts for dinner so you're blatantly masochist the comment was conveniently misconstrued geez Cindy tonight sure was a gasp sure was now hold on there skip aren't you gonna be a gentleman and invite that pretty young thing upstairs upstairs upstairs I love upstairs what's upstairs whoa slow down there cowboy undoing a bra is like getting out of a Japanese internment camp struggling just makes it worse once you've identified if it's hooked in the back just apply a small amount of controlled pressure to the tab pinch it so the hooks come on done and voila congratulations skipper you just made it to second base my work here is done you know it's not really doing it for me whoa what do you mean I got nothing Oh looks like skipper here is pretty anal and I'm not talking about keeping his desk clean we'll see the next time

27 thoughts on “Breast Education: 1950's Sex Ed Parody

  1. But he got hard when he saw her cleavage…So I'm guessing he's not gay but sometimes suffers from e.d.? Lol.

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